Dal Returns in “Terpsichorean vs the Octopi!” 4/15/2011

giant-octopus-55949

For authenticity sake, I have not cleaned this up or changed anything from the original. The rules with the Word of the Day prevented me from proofreading. I am not going to “George Lucas” my own work. The word was Terpsichorean:

terp·si·cho·re·an
ˌtərpsikəˈrēən,-ˈkôrēən/

adjective

formal humorous
  1. 1.
    of or relating to dancing.
noun

formal-humorous
  1. 1.
    a dancer.

One day, Dal was popping and locking like he normally does, when a large octopus fell to the ground in front of him. Before Dal could figure out what was going on, another one hit closely to where the other one had hit. Dal wanted to question what was happening but when he’s in this kind of Terpsichorean mood, even octopi falling from the sky is not enough to interrupt his breakin’.

One of the 8 legged creatures spoke to him. “Why have you built this ground here? It’s in our way to our breeding grounds in the Nebular Oceans. You can’t just put things in our way like that.” Dal was listening with one ear but dancing with every other part of his body.  He decided to free up his mouth long enough to reply, “Dang Octopi from the Sky….you can’t fall here. I’m popping and locking and this ground needs to be here for when I do my  2880 degree head spin.” The second octopus, being mathematically gifted, deduced that Dal was referring to an 8 revolution head spin. He spoke, “You put this ground in our way so that you could do an 8 revolution head spin?” Dal released his voice once again long enough to say, “Darn Right Octopi from the Sky….now move along. I’m dancing here.”

Peace seemed almost completely uncertain until a third octopus fell from the sky. This octopus was much more diplomatic than the others so he addressed Dal in a calm soothing voice. “We want to settle this peacefully…can we not agree that since we have 8 legs and you do your 2880 degree head spin, that we can resolve this somehow? 8 is enough….after all……”  Dal decided to stop dancing in order to work out an agreement. The talks went for several days. Many good arguments were presented from both sides and some agreements were made. The peace accord struck, Dal and the Octopi from the Sky shook hands. Dal was going to move the ground out of the way so that they could safely travel to their breeding grounds in the Nebular Oceans. The Octopi were to provide Dal a proper place to “Pop and Lock all the live long day” as it was written verbatim in the accord.

As soon as they had reached peace, a seagull flew in and assessed the situation. “SQUAK! Squak SQUAK!” Dal didn’t understand how to speak bird since back in his college days so he asked for the bird to speak in English. The bird, having recently gotten out of an abusive relationship with an English speaking dolphin, was not too keen on the idea. The bird was about to give up and fly away but yielded for the sake of getting its message to Dal. In its thick seagull accent she said, “Hello there….you should know something about these specimen you reached peace with. The octopus in the ocean are notorious for being wise and industrious…Octopi don’t get dropped out of planes unless they are completely insane or in a cult. That is how they deal with their own kind when they’ve become one or the other”  The octopi huddled up and had a private discussion amongst themselves. The diplomatic one admitted to being in a cult and pulled out a sharp blade and performed the ancient Japanese ritual suicide of the samurai in front of everyone. The original one that had not shown any particular skill or talent up to this point, jumped into the air hoping to escape, only to be picked up by a Red Wings fan and thrown onto the ice after a hat trick at Joe Louis Arena.

The mathematically skilled octopus, having witnessed all of this carnage before him, politely exited from the area and was never seen again. Dal and the seagull were engaged later that year and had more pop and lock seagull-man babies than they knew what to do with. On his deathbed, Dal asked the love bird of his life to fly him up as high as she could so that he could drop to the Nebular Oceans like the Octopi when they had first met. Dal’s dementia had spread a great deal by now but his wife couldn’t refuse his last dying request. She dropped him and he hit the ground next to one of his popping and locking children that had left home many years ago. The child, now fully grown with a family of his own said to the quickly fading paternal parent, “The Nebular Oceans are a made up thing, Dad. You’re crazy”  Dal died a few minutes later but only after he completed one last 2880 degree head spin with his prodigal child.

The End

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